Where I’m At

This is a letter to bring you up to date on where I’m at, where I’ve been and where I’m going.

I’ve been thinking a lot about my past since the new year began. I know God wants to bring closure and healing to some open wounds from my past and I’m seeing a plan take shape to deal with them.

I think part of the healing process will involve writing about my past and bringing the dark things from it into the light. I’ve been considering the possibility of writing an autobiography of sorts – covering the entire span of my career as as paramedic.

Writing (for me) is therapeutic. There’s a freedom that comes from telling my story. Heather Goodman asked me what it is that I like most about story-telling. I realized that my greatest  emotional need is to be understood and accepted. So writing stories is how I meet that need. I write, and in the process, my heart is revealed. If you understand and accept me, my emotional need is satisfied.

Of course, if I’m rejected because of my past, I’ll suffer the consequences. That’s the risk you take when you write about your own problems.

Writing about my career will probably begin as a series of Facebook Notes. The audience that reads my notes is supportive and safe. And the stuff I need to share requires a safe audience.

This is not to say that most of my readers here are not supportive or safe – you are. But my Facebook friends are the folks I hang out with every day and they really ‘get me’ on a deeper level. So if the notes go well, I’ll probably publish them here. The long term goal might be to turn them into a book.

Speaking of Facebook – I’ll be taking a short break from Facebook this week. I know that I spend a lot of time on Facebook, and it may seem to some as though Facebook is my life, but I do have another life outside of it.

I’ve been extremely busy at work lately. The prayer requests, bacon posts and private messages have swamped me and I’m feeling overwhelmed. So I decided last night to de-activate my account for a few days.

This is something I didn’t plan on, since most of my dreams lately have highlighted networking on Facebook. I don’t expect to be offline very long.

I feel at times as if my message isn’t reaching some people. If I had to summarize my message, it would be, (speaking of the miraculous) “Anyone can do this.”

I try to encourage people to step into their identity in Christ and do the things Jesus did. The entire purpose of this blog and my Facebook account is to show people they can do the things I’m doing. So it frustrates me when people allow the enemy to beat them up, when they live in fear and hopelesness, and when they continue believing the lie that they need a ‘Man of God’ to pray for their miracle instead of doing it themselves.

We all have the same access to the throne of God. We all have the same Spirit living in us. Jesus is just as capable of healing through you as he is through me. So why do we continue believing the lie that we must have the ‘Anointed  Man of God’ handle our crisis?

I guess that frustration is getting to me again, so I need to step away from Facebook for a while. The frustration I feel over this issue is probably why I wrote the book that we’ll soon be publishing, which is a ‘Do It Yourself’ book on healing, deliverance & raising the dead.

One last thing…

A lot of you are gathering for the Global Kingdom Awakening seminar in Kansas in August. There are going to be hundreds of people there that I’d love to meet. Pete Cabrera, who is the host, has offered to arrange transportation for me. But I have one problem….

I have this job. If I want to bring home a paycheck, I need to work. Lately, I’ve been working overtime to keep up with the bills. As much as I’d love to take a week off work to attend the seminar & maybe teach one of the sessions, if I take time off work, the bills don’t get paid. And the bills must be paid. So the prospects of attending are rather slim right now.

So that’s where I’m at. Thanks for listening.

I love you all,

PM