DID Self-Healing: Integrating Fragments and Alters
I’ve been working with a prayer counselor for over a year, to work on what could be termed “soul-healing.” While I’ve discussed in previous articles here and here what fragments are and why they’re important, I haven’t discussed how to heal them when you don’t have a prayer-partner available to help. The benefit of this for me is that I can accelerate the integration process, using the work I do with my counselor as a base to pursue further prayer work on my own. In this message, I’ll explain my own process of fragment self-healing.
When I first learned about this, I realized I had already done some self-healing fragment work but didn’t know I was working with fragments. All I knew was that what I saw in the spirit seemed to be effective. So I would do it from time to time with no terminology for it. Since then, I’ve developed a slightly more defined method that works well for me, and hopefully, it will work well for you. If not, my hope is that it provides some insight that you can use to develop your own method.
I used to begin by imagining a large space with a platform in the center. On that platform was a pillar of gold or blue light, with a small version of me in the middle. I view this as my “core self.” I would envision lots of people standing outside the pillar—other versions or aspects of myself that needed to be brought into unity and wholeness. I would then mentally intend or will for those fragments to line up and walk up the steps of the platform and into the light. As they would walk into the pillar, they would be sucked inside my image of my core self. One of the things that surprised me when I did this was just how many fragments were milling around outside the light pillar—hundreds, possibly more. Even when I had them line up and integrate, there were usually still many more that wouldn’t get in line and join together.
This was one of the things that showed me I was on to something. Typically, when I daydream and imagine something, I am fully in control of what happens because it is all inside my mind. When I engage spiritual reality, not everything responds according to my will, simply because there are other sentient beings involved, whose choices I can’t control. In this case, those fragments who chose not to integrate were those who were either not ready or not willing to do so. I would at times, try to make them integrate, but that only worked minimally as I could sense them fighting against me.
Fast forward years later, I still use an integration method that is similar, but I’ve added a few components. First, while I still make use of a “fragment plain”—the open space filled with fragments—I’ve changed the way I visualize the location. Now I often imagine myself in the throne room of God with the fragments and my core self in front of the Father. Jesus is there and I ask Him and the angels to help me integrate the fragments, which they do. I begin by asking Jesus to separate all the fragments who are ready to integrate at this moment, and to have them come join my core self. Then I ask the angels to minister to all of the fragments who are close to being ready, but who aren’t quite there yet. As I do this, and give it a few minutes, sometimes they will choose to integrate as well. Finally, I ask Jesus to work on the ones who aren’t ready—and most especially to reveal Himself to the fragments that don’t know Him.
The most recent time I did fragment self-healing was while driving to work. For some, this may seem dangerous but I have become accustomed to engaging the visionary realm while doing other activities, so it was relatively safe and easy for me. What surprised me was that on this particular occasion as I began having the fragments integrate, I began crying. This is significant to me because I’ve found when working with fragments that crying indicates healing and integration. In the natural, our bodies release tears when negative emotional energies are released, and the physical composition of our tears are different from when we have something in our eye. Thus, when I found myself crying it further confirmed to me that this method actually works and isn’t a figment of my imagination.
The main benefit of self-integration is that I don’t have to wait for someone else. Jesus is the Master-healer and if I let Him guide the session, it tends to be effective. Previously, when I didn’t understand what I was doing, I tried to force the fragments to integrate via my will, and while it worked for some, there were others that simply wouldn’t respond and nothing I did could make them. When Jesus loves them into submission, they willingly go where He leads, and as He is the Good Shepherd, they are able to trust Him with their safety and well-being when it comes time to integrate.
The other important thing about being Spirit-led in this process, and letting Jesus run the show, is that He will often do more than I expect. Most recently He took three fragments with Him that He indicated needed special attention—and far more help than I would be able to provide them on my own. From what I was able to discern, these particular fragments were under heavy demonic bondage. He assured me that in the right time, He would integrate them with me, but that He was going to do a deep work in them and set them free.
If fragment self-healing is something you are interested in or have been seeking, consider trying the method I laid out above. If the idea of using the throne room of God doesn’t work for you, try another location. The “fragment plain” is always a good option, and you can fill it with healing power and glory light in prayer before you assemble your fragments there. The benefit of the light pillar is that it acts as a protective mechanism for your core self—keeping it inside the pillar and having the other fragments come to it is an act of submission and/or subservience, which really just ensures that no other personalities take over during the integration process. While it is not extremely common, it can happen, so the protective screen seems prudent to me.
If you try this out, consider commenting and sharing your experiences below. Share what worked, what didn’t work, and any new things you learn along the way. If you have another method that works well for you, share that as well—because I firmly believe when we share what we know, together we grow.
I find myself trapped inside the house that I was raised in. There’s a girl (me) outside the house. She can’t get in and I can’t get out. I know she is me…
This could be an alter stuck there. There may be a spiritual place designed to bevthst home, or it could be an internal place. I would talk to the girl and ask her if she wants Jesus to rescue her. Invite Jesus is. You may need to forgive people or renounce something. I pray you find someone who can help you. 🙂
Thanks for sharing your process. The book, The Shining Man With Hurt Hands, has helped my understanding in some of these things too.
I have found giving a voice to my pain has helped integrate a whole chunk or lot of my soul into itself again, i used to have many disturbing intrusive thoughts and anxiousness and fears about things, and i learnt this technique of voicing my pain and feelings about various things good and bad from different experiences that came to my attention over the course of time this past year, and the result has been a significantly quieter and calmer mind a more loving countenance, peacefulness and way less tormenting experiences internally, also i found recent relief in my emotional experience by doing decree’s they have helped a lot especially in helping a trauma on my heart heal a lot. i feel more me now than i have in a long time but there is still somethings that are being fine tuned and addressed by god. i have become more loving as a result of getting release to a whole lot of pain i wasn’t even aware i had. all by the grace of god.
I had a similar experience way back, I was a pretty mess up girl as I was sexually abused as a very young child.
In this one dream I was upstairs in my old house and I was doing something in a closet , putting away some clothes or something. I then heard a scream from down the hallway and they said ” theirs a ghost beside you” I looked and I ran outside. Once outside I realized that it was crazy to be scared, so I got back upstairs only to find a little girl she was scared and looked dirty, but it look like it was through a smoke screen that I saw her. But somehow I knew it was me, a fragment of my past that I needed to invite back into myself. So I did, I took it to the Lord and I saw her close to me so I invited her to come back and that I needed her back in my life and told her that I loved her. Never had a dream like this again. But I do know that their is more fragmentation of me that needs to get back. I pay attention to my dreams, the Lord speaks to me that way allot. When the Lord touches my emotions in certain areas like a word exp. a word made me cry yesterday I heard on a testimony it was worthless. I shared this experience with my husband and that was the first step to my healing. How I found out that I was sexually abused was through dream, a little at the time the Lord would give me. It took some time. But I do believe that every trauma in our life is a fragment. I have experienced it. Thank you for sharing your explanation to us I will pray about it and deal with more issues in my life.
whdn I follow his instructions, I felt something merge on my body 2x , curious what is it, pls advice. Thks z lot for posting this.
Forgiveness has been the key for me. My conception followed an unwanted pregnancy and miscarriage. My parents were violent in their anger, cursing, wild weeping during my unwanted prenatal period and birth. Not being cuddled, I did not thrive. Have tried to give my life away through suicide, codependent relationships, risky behaviors, etc. While abroad I heard Jack Frost speak and got his tapes. I couldn’t focus, so I laboriously transcribed his tapes and understood the importance of forgiving my tormentors. But Praying Medic has helped me to understand the possibility of having our griefs and sorrows healed through Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross. Having lived a forgiving life-style for several years, I found emotional healing fairly easy, but I went back to once again cancel others’ debts against me. I repented at a deeper level and asked for integration as I went. Finally alters were exposed. Some were actually integrated as I worked through forgiveness, but some were not. The Father sovereignly exposed the last stronghold and helped me to integrate her in an awesome, loving, gentle way.
Here is a more current Internet site I have found helpful http://www.net-burst.net/help/multiple-personalities.htm. The site owner offers free counseling. The Shining Man is free and also the author is affirming.
I did it & I felt something merge inside of my body 2x?
I am learning to minister inner healing and I am curious as to how you were so severely fragmented. I am convinced it is real and I’m only aware of satanic ritual abuse and some other evil agendas.
I’m sorry for what happened to you and I’m glad to hear the Lord is healing your broken/shattered/fragmented heart. Bless your healing process and for sharing it.
I immediately thought of Jesus speaking about a flock of sheep that the Shepard left majority and proceeded to find the sheep that were separated from the flock. Paraphrase intended as the thing that came to mind was the majority represent the frags and alters that have been rejoin to the heart. The the separated sheep represent the frags and alters that haven’t made up and reconciled with Jesus, but He is there for them as He’s the Good Shepherd in this story. This very fresh realization has destroyed the “yeah right” response that I’ve had from reading the story in the Bible and gave me something to ponder and integrate into my work with Jesus concerning my manifestation of Jesus’s promises of becoming whole,spirit soul and body